How Come I Miss What I Never Knew

3/16/12
Baby Boom Baby 

As I am sure you are slowly realizing, though I claim to love all music, I am impartial to Folk music- James Taylor being the creme de la creme in my mind. I have long had this theory that there is a JT song for every occasion (Yes, JT, we're close like that). Baby Boom Baby is the most under-rated song of his career. I tried to find a version of it on YouTube and there isn't one with lyrics, THAT'S how underrated it is. This guitar-only version by YouTube user GioPelosi is very beautifully done, the music is haunting. The lyrics are what does me in though. It is the perfect hopeless/hopeful song.

http://youtu.be/TLAbhouGyAw

Right now I am right in-between hopeless and hopeful. I have started my second post-termination period and am looking ahead to another pregnancy. I am hoping to get this part- the very end- of the song soon:

Now I'm caught in the spotlight

Walking the wire

my feet are frozen and my heart's on fire

What do I do if my dream comes true 

James Taylor, Baby Boom Baby

But most of the time I feel stuck in the early verses. The parts of the song lamenting a loss. I very much miss Blue Sunday. I miss being pregnant, sure. But I mostly miss the idea of Blue Sunday. The dreams I had, the things I wanted to share with a baby of mine.

How come I miss 

what I never knew

and drag out the past just to paint it blue

And spend my days with a dream of you
James Taylor, Baby Boom Baby

I desperately miss what I never knew.  I know this is way high on the crazy scale- but I love that "Blue" is in there. I feel like it is in there for us- Blue Sunday and me. Yes, I know that this song was released in 1988- when I was 5. I have (sadly) never met JT. But it makes me feel better- we have a song. I have that to hold onto.

Supersize It

So that was a downer. In a funnier note:

I had a dream last night that reminded me of one of my favorite SNL skits of all time. I dreamed that I got a baby from a drive though window. The person in front of me took the one I wanted, the younger baby. It was looking at me with those big eyes babies have when they are small and playing with a sucker. The bigger baby was really cute though, a red-head holding a blue blanket, like my pink one. I ended up with the bigger baby- a one-year old boy. Always boys. In thinking how silly it is to get someone from a drive through, I started thinking about "Supersize It" from SNL with N*SYNC It went:

Why don't drive through my heart Can I take your order?

Look what you get for just one more quarter

Wanna supersize it

Hold the pickles 

and do it up big

When it comes to my love, I be a hungry pig (snort snort).

Come on and supersize it

Hold the pickles 

I'm down on my knees 

If you don't want all my love, next window please.

If there was such a thing as "The Internet" when that came out it would have been HUGE. (*This is hyperbole- there was the internet-- but it was still just weird AOL chat rooms and IMs that were sent to random people that said "A/S/L?". I know for a fact that this song came out my senior year of high school- so in 2000 or 2001. I was newly dating my husband. 2 friends of mine reenacted this skit in my kitchen after giving blood that afternoon at the school blood drive and then going bowling. We were all light-headed and about to faint- but had a blast. I might post a picture later. It is pretty classic (*by which I mean "embarrassing to 99% of people")