I mentioned in a recent post that my cycle was crazy. I also have mentioned
that I am in a wedding in September. These have combined to some baby-making
decisions.
I spent a few hours sorting out (new) insurance, referrals (which in the end
I didn’t need, though I was initially told I did) and called the RE.
I know that some of you are reading this probably think we're jumping the
gun. Here is our reasoning: It took 15 months and clomid last time. We want 3
(hub) or 4 (me) kids.. time is not on our side with that timeline. If after
each kid we waited until we were ready and then started trying for 15 months,
succeeded and then had a 9 month pregnancy resulting in a live birth- I'd be
about 50 when we got to 4. Clearly, that is not an option. On top of that, with
my history of troubled pregnancies the more into AMA I have kids, the more
likely I am to have things go wrong. Again.
I called the clinic we use (Boston IVF which is FANTASTIC if you’re in the
area and are in need of an RE) and spoke with the person who is dedicated to
answering “are you the place for me” type calls. We know we like it there, and
we know we got great (adorable) results, but I didn’t know if they can see me.
As it turns out, once you’re in, you’re in. We don’t have to wait another
failed year of TTC. as mentioned above there was a bit of an insurance snafu,
so that was a headache, but it was sorted out and I have an appointment a week
from Wednesday 12/3. YIKES.
This is just a consult type appointment to set up testing, discuss options
and have the doctor tell me what we already know. I need to stop BF before
starting Clomid. The woman we called- the one who answers potential patient questions-
told me as much. I’m SO torn about it. In the long run, this is the right decision
for my family- new baby vs. extended BF. I want kins to have a sibling close in
age. I don’t want to be BF kins more than a year or so anyway.. but I’ll miss it.
I’ve stopped pumping at work (yay!!!) and kins definitely is cutting back in
amount of time and quantity of milk he’s taking for his 2 remaining nursing
sessions- morning and night. The night session will be HARD to drop, the
morning he is self-weaning away from. With the examination cycle looming, I
really need to stop BF sooner rather than later even though it seems like we
have time. If nursing kins lingers longer than I am anticipating then I’m ok
with that too- in the long run delaying a month or two isn’t the end of the
world. He’s only going to be small for a little bit longer. I already miss my
baby, I’m going to be losing another piece of his babyhood at the end of BF’ing.
He's already grown so much!!!
We have no intention of starting Clomid until at least Mid-January and
likely February. This wedding has allowed us to take 2 months off from TTC-
this cycle and next, giving us a natural break before gearing up again. The way
my cycle fell one moth would put the due date two weeks before the wedding and
the other two weeks after. I wouldn’t hold off on family building for most
people, but the bride is my best friend from college and I am the maid of
honor. I am so, so excited and honored. I don’t have a sister, and the maid of
honor from my wedding does- so I didn’t think I would get the chance to be the
MOH. I love her, and I want her day to be the day of her dreams- and part of
that was to have me there and in the wedding. I’m not risking being in labor
for it. I have been honest that I might be as far as 34 weeks along and she’s
fine with a beach ball being in her wedding ;) Fortunately, it’s on the beach-
so I’d fit right in.
So that’s the update.
Exciting, a
little sad and technically in a bit of a lull.
Oh darling don't you ever grow up, don't you ever grow up
Just stay this little
Oh darling don't you ever grow up, don't you ever grow up
It could stay this simple
Taylor Swift, Never Grow Up